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On motherhood and...Tiredness


Tiredness is…
Emptying a can of sweetcorn into a sieve in the sink, before realising the sieve is upside down.
Walking down the ridiculously steep hill you live on, feeling quietly proud of yourself for getting the baby in the sling and all her bits and bobs in a bag, then remembering you’ve forgotten to put your own coat or jumper on.
Locking yourself out of the house with the baby inside (not quite as bad as it sounds – see previous post).
Forgetting to invite one of your best friends to your birthday.
Making it to the Post Office 0.5 miles from your house and feeling like Captain Oates.
Being so bad tempered that you tell the cat to fuck off.
Also, envying the cat for sleeping so much.
Having utterly nonsensical arguments that go something like this:
You: I’m so sad I can’t leave the house tomorrow to meet X because the baby has a cold.
Them: Not to worry, you can always rearrange.
You: WHY ARE YOU ALWAYS TELLING ME OFF?
Consuming three bowls of cereal, three biscuits and three cups of tea for breakfast, adding sugar to all but the biscuits. Food is fuel.
Realising you actively hate inanimate objects, especially the car seat.
Pioneering new recipes, such as ‘fish finger Caesar salad’
Crying at ‘Ant and Dec’s Saturday Night Takeaway’.

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